Your's In Eternity
by CatatonicVanity
Summary: Why? Was he suicidal? Did he want to die? Or was he just willing to die for me?


**Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note, its characters or any labels mentioned within. **

**AN: I don't know why this hit me, but it's such a bittersweet thought and I love it for some reason. I felt Matt and Mello didn't have proper closure in the series and this came out. **

**Warning: This contains religious themes and is not meant to offend any person. I am not attempting to force my religion on any reader of this and should anyone be offended by the mention of Christianity, please turn back.**

Mello listened to Linder, feeling oddly detached. Near was going to have his name written in a false Death Note, _so he thought._ Mello knew all about Mikami, and Matt's brilliant hacking skills had allowed them to keep tabs on him. He was so methodical. He would be going to the bank today, getting into that safety deposit box. Matt had hacked the cameras and watched to see what he did, and what they found had been shocking.

Mikami had the real Death Note in the box.

Near would have his name written in the real notebook, unknowing that the one he had altered would be fake. He would die, Kira would win, and all of his and Matt's effort, all of Near's and all of L's effort and suffering would be in vain.

That was unacceptable.

Mihael Keehl was rash and unpredictable. He was temperamental and ambitious. He would do anything to be first, to be the best, for his parents before they died, for L before he died. But now for who? The world? No, he would die and the world would never know. No one but a select few would know of his death, and that it had saved the world from the terror that was Kira.

Was it for Near? No, that couldn't be it. It wouldn't matter in the long run if the sheep died. And even if Near acknowledged Mihael for what he was about to do, it wouldn't assuage anything.

For L, perhaps? Maybe in some corner of his mind, he still wanted to avenge L. Mostly though, Mihael just wanted for the static to end. Not necessarily for him, he loved the excitement. It was all for Matt.

His childhood friend was everything to him. He would never admit it aloud, no, but he had fallen hard for the redheaded gamer. All of his strange little quirks enticed the blonde, his obsessive video gaming, his chain smoking, those stupid goggles and that ugly vest. He loved that he could come home raging and that Matt would drop everything and dance around Mello for hours, blocking and dodging, allowing Mello to expend his anger until he collapsed in frustration. He loved how afterwards, Matt would carry him to bed and the next morning it was never mentioned.

He loved that Matt could control him, though no one knew. He loved that Matt had such a calming aura around him, able to calm him with a look. He loved Matt's infectious laughter and his lopsided smile, his lazy, laidback attitude and that he didn't really care what people thought of him. He loved Matt with everything that was salvageable of his soul and heart.

And he hated Matt.

He hated that Matt had followed him so willingly, trailing him from Whammy's, tracing his location with ease and showing up and the hideout one day, asking to see Mello. He hated that Matt followed him so willingly and never knew of his feelings, and that Matt would never love him back. He hated Matt for taking the verbal abuse like it didn't affect him. He hated it all, and he hated that he had grown close to him. He hated that he had done what he swore he would never do: love.

He hated that Matt had trusted him with his real name. He hated himself for trusting Matt back with the treasure, but couldn't bring himself to regret it.

He hated that he loved Matt. He loved that unusual bright red hair, those stupid goggles and that ugly vest. He loved those emerald orbs called eyes that Matt hid away, reserving for Mello alone. He thought back to the first time he had seen those eyes.

_Little eight year old Matt had been shoved into Mello's room, with Roger barking that they would be roommates and to be nice. Matt had scampered to his bed and curled up under the covers, playing his game. Eventually he passed out and Mello took his goggles off, prying the game from his hands and turning it off. He placed both objects on the bedside table and went to sleep in his own bed._

_Hours later he was awakened by the pathetic sound of Matt whimpering. He looked over to find Matt tossing and turning in his bed, pleading with someone Mello couldn't see to stop, to please don't, and Mello didn't have to be a genius to know._

_Standing and going to Matt's bed, he shook the boy's shoulder, waking the redhead with a start and making him fall to the floor. Mello knelt down to help him up and found gorgeous emerald eyes staring back at him. Mello felt that he could have lost himself in those eyes for hours at a time, falling into their depths and drowning in them._

_Standing, Mello made his way to his bed and held up his covers. "You can sleep here tonight, if you want."_

_Matt stared warily, before relenting and crawling over, then slinking into the bed. Mello slipped in with him and took his hand._

"_Do you want to be my friend? I'll keep you safe and I'll never let anyone touch you and I'll get you chocolate and be the best friend ever," the chocoholic said._

_Matt looked over earnestly. "You promise to stay with me forever?" he asked timidly._

_Mello nodded. "Forever and ever."_

_Matt snuggled up to him. "Best friends. Forever," he promised._

From that day on they were inseparable. Mello smiled at the thought. Everyone at Whammy's knew never to mess with either of them, and you never referred to one without having the other. They were connected at the hip.

Mello sighed, getting on his bike and going back to the apartment he and Matt shared. Going home for the last time. It was such a bitter thought.

Matt knew something was wrong with his friend when he came in the door. It opened slowly, revealing a shaken Mello and closed quietly, worrying Matt beyond comprehension.

"Mello? What's going on?" he asked shakily. Mello looked up slowly, staring at Matt in a scrutinizing way. Matt pulled his goggles down, allowing them to hang around his neck and meeting Mello's gaze full force.

Mello took a shuddering breath and went to the couch, sitting down heavily. Matt followed suit and sat next to him, ready to listen.

So Mello told. He told Matt of Near's plan and the flaw, and that he could fix it. He told Matt the price. He told Matt of what he needed to do, should he choose to, and emphasized that Matt had a choice, that he didn't have to do this, that he could disappear into the system and Mello wouldn't think bad of him.

Matt shook his head adamantly and told Mello he would do it. Mello was shocked, scared, angry, horrified… Relieved?

Matt wasn't turning his back on him. He was going with him… Straight to his death.

Mello snapped. "WHY, MATT? WHY WOULD YOU FOLLOW ME SO FUCKING BLINDLY? WE'RE GOING TO FUCKING DIE AND YOU'RE JUST GOING TO FUCKING GO WITH IT?"

Mello was suddenly silenced by a pair of soft lips pressing against his. His eyes went wide to find Matt kissing him softly, his eyes closed. Mello's eyes fluttered shut and he kissed back slowly, tasting the acidic mixture of Monster and cigarettes and Chinese takeout.

Their lips moved in sync, kissing slowly and softly, pouring passion and love into the contact with all they were worth. Matt's arms snaked around Mello and Mello slid his fingers into Matt's crimson locks, savoring the texture.

As quickly as it had started, it was over. Matt pulled back and opened his eyes, staring through Mello's blackened soul and giving it light and life and love once more.

"I go because I love you, and because wherever you go I will follow. I will happily follow you into eternity, because without you there is no me."

Mello sat in shock, staring at his lifelong friend. The words didn't want to compute, and it was a long time before Mello could respond. "I love you too Matt… I love you so much."

They engulfed one another in their arms, holding each other and simply reveling in the other's presence. All night they lay there, neither sleeping, neither speaking, simply being.

The next morning, as they were getting ready to leave, they went over the plan one last time. Mello's heart wrenched at the idea of Matt dying for him and Matt wrapped his arms around him tightly.

"It'll all be okay. Together forever, remember?" Matt reassured and Mello took slight comfort in the words. They walked hand in hand down the stairs from their shitty apartment, through the parking lot to their vehicles, parked side by side.

Matt leaned over and kissed Mello's lips, their second kiss. They held each other close and felt one another under their fingertips. Finally, they pulled apart and Matt lifted his hands to caress Mello's cheek. Mello returned the gesture.

"I love you Mihael. I always will." Matt withdrew Mello's rosary from his pocket and slipped it around Mello's neck. Mello looked up questioningly. Matt said simply, "To remind you that there's another side. That there's eternity waiting for us."

Mello stared deep into green eyes. "I love you Mail. I always will."

Matt smiled and opened the car door. "I'll see you on the other side, Mihael. Don't cry for me, cry for the living."

And he was gone. Slipping into the car and shutting the door, feeling the purr of the motor and the weight of the gun in his hand. And he wouldn't regret anything.

Two long hours later, Mello pretended he didn't know about the Death Note scrap with Takada. He pretended to have a confident air, like he didn't know he was going to die. Climbing into the cab of the truck and turning on the television, he said in a convincingly distraught voice, "Matt. I'm so sorry. I never thought you'd be killed."

Matt's death still hurt his heart, knowing that his love had died for him. He drove to the church and when he felt his heart stop, he knew death was coming. To be with Matt, he welcomed the icy embrace.

He watched from afar as the church burned to the ground, watched Kira pretend to be upset and smiled, knowing the devil would be sent back to hell soon enough. Standing and allowing newfound wings to burst from his back, he found himself confused by them. He was in Heaven, he would be with Matt, but he had sinned so much. Caused so much hurt and death, and yet he was welcomed into the Father's embrace.

Suddenly, Matt appeared beside him. Matt had matching wings and a bright, loving smile. He leaned forward and kissed Mello, pouring all the love and passion he had into the connection.

Another figure appeared, and Mello knew instantly that he was in the presence of a higher being. He was in the presence of God.

He dropped to his knees, taking in His appearance. A black, crisp suit was worn, along with black leather dress shoes. He looked, maybe, thirty five years old. He had sandy blonde hair that was medium length, falling just below his eyebrows in a shaggy and unkempt manner. He had a sharply defined face that was clean shaven.

His eyes were grey. Not a blue-grey, but truly storm cloud grey with knowledge and wisdom and infinite kindness.

"I-I don't understand," Mello began.

A soft, kind voice that rang with authority cut him off. "You don't understand how you achieved Heaven with the sins committed in your short life. And you did because you have a pure heart with pure intentions, even if you moved to achieve them with impure actions. You kept faith strong in your heart and love; you loved Mail here with everything you are, along with Me. You love my Son, your Lord and have accepted Him into your heart. You are worthy."

Mihael sat in awe, staring with his mouth agape at such a power that should hate him, but loved him. Mail smiled and offered his hand, which Mihael took. With a fleeting glance at the Lord and the burning church, they spread their wings and flew, leaving behind the pain and anguish and sorrow. They flew to forever, maintaining a lifelong promise, and staying themselves, best friends and lovers.

And never before had they looked so forward to eternity.


End file.
